How easy is it for you to forgive someone else? How easy is it for you to forgive yourself? Building forgiveness can be a powerful skill to have in our wellbeing toolboxes. Some find forgiveness easy, others find it more challenging. The good news is that we can learn to build forgiveness. Researchers find that cultivating forgiveness can lead to better mental and physical health. Important to note is that forgiveness is truly for you, not for the person who harmed you. It allows you to learn and grow from your experiences and build a life you want to live. So how can we build forgiveness? Starting small by simply allowing space in our mind to be curious about what we do have in this world to be grateful for-no matter how small. Then we can REACH for forgiveness through this evidence-based strategy: Recall the hurt; Empathize with the one who hurt you; Altruistically decide to forgive; Commit publicly to forgiveness; and Hold on to that forgiveness. REACH for forgiveness. Remember, forgiveness is not forgive and forget. It’s forgive and move on for you. You alone can reclaim your power over your own life.
Life Hack Reflections:
- Is there someone you want to forgive—or someone from whom you want to seek forgiveness?
- What hurt, resentment, or guilt are you still carrying?
- How has holding onto it affected your wellbeing?
- What might forgiveness make possible in your life or relationships?
- How might letting go help you invest your energy where it matters most?